Pierre may be coming to visit in May. He makes an annual trip to the States to feed his unhealthy obsession with America. Sometimes he stops by Utah, sometimes not. The last time he did was two years ago. He had brought two friends who wanted to float in the Salt Lake. Floating in the lake isn't half bad, if you don't mind the stink and the flies. So we floated, then took in the city sights, then stopped to eat.
Pierre wanted to eat in the food court at the mall, because of all the "variety" of fast food restaurants. His two friends were U.S. first-timers, and he wanted to expose them to America's fast food choices in one sweep. There are two malls in downtown Salt Lake that are across the street from each other. This was an ideal place, according to Pierre, because you get twice the food court.
I went into the first court, perfectly satisfied with my options, ready to eat. Not so with Pierre. "This one doesn't have a lot of variety," he told me. "We should go to the other one."
"The other one is pretty much exactly the same," I said. It was true. How much variety can one expect in a mall food court? This isn't Disney World, Pierre. But he insisted, so we went. We split up, bought our food, and met back at a table. I came back with lemon pepper chicken from some Asian restaurant. All three of the Frenchies came back with...burgers and fries. Rather ugly White Castle looking burgers and fries, I might add. It was hard not to laugh.
"I thought you wanted variety," I said.
"I didn't know what else to get," he said.
This is still hilarious to me, to this day. Pierre and his burgers.