In the proud tradition of Damned Ladies 1 and Damned Ladies 2, comes the all-new, totally exciting Damned Ladies 3: quotes from all-girl coworkers around my cubicle. As always, no context will be given. Enjoy.
“Oh no, I have skittles falling out of my chest!”
"She's got hair like a human."
“I don’t just want them out of my life anymore, I want them DEAD.”
“I so look like Tori Spelling, with my big, long face.”
- “What is it that your mom always says?”
- “Oh, that I’m a lesbian?”
“I want big teeth.”
“Don’t suck on your hair, you’ll get diseases.”
- “What do you call it when you hold yourself up in a place?”
- “Hostagized?”
“Oh. My. Gosh. There’s a giant bald spot in my head.”
“He’s the only human being I can honestly say that if I saw him standing in the road, I would slam on my gas and KILL him.”
10 comments:
i'm surrounded by women, but i don't get any of those funny comments.
Maybe you do, but you don't remember them. I immediately write down any comments that make me chuckle. Sometimes I'm busy and put off writing something down till later -- and I ALWAYS end up forgetting it. So much silly woman-chatter lost in the wind.
haha. no... i only get the women who are SUPER into sports. almost to the point where i think they're just trying to prove something...
and then the yentas. i will definitely keep my ears open, though... maybe it would help if i took the earbuds out of my ears.
"I so look like Tori Spelling, with my big, long face."
LMAO... I'll be cracking up about that one all day :D The women in your office are either really funny or really stupid... I can't decide. ;)
I'm pretty sure it's a mixture of both.
I'm thinking about all of the stupid shit that I say out loud...
By the way...my favorite one was,
"She's got hair like a human."
I AM STILL CRACKING UP ON THAT ONE.
What worries me is that I know I've said things like this without thinking. It's pretty amusing...especially after I realize what I'm saying.
I've heard guys say things like this too...my favorite one was yesterday...
*Wyatt pulls on car door in an attempt to open it*
"Um, Theresa...your door is frozen shut"
*...As I open my door and get in on the drivers side*
"Well, give me a second to get in and I'll unlock it for you."
Yea...that was hilarious. I guess you just had to be there...
too funny. agree with theresa.
"she's got hair like a human."
and
"I wish I had big teeth."
crazy
but I know I've said wackier things in my day. I was on television once for saying that the world was like a blueberry pie, and I was the part with the most seeds. They were asking my thoughts about multiculturalism.
Look at you, all famous on T.V. What kind of program was it?
I was on T.V. once -- but it was just my college government class asking questions to the governor of Utah. The question I prepared was about political action commmittees, but the guy before me asked a very similar question, so I had to quickly change mine. I had 10 seconds to think, so I came up with the lamest question ever: "What is the biggest problem facing Utah today?"
Didn't impress my professor with that one. Thus ended my brief, but pointless stint with television.
Post a Comment