There is a little bar on the top of my blog with a button labeled “next blog.” Clicking it will send you off to some other blog, chosen at random. I decided to give this a whirl, you know, see what's out there in cyberspace. Perhaps I would stumble upon something truly engaging, hilarious, educational and/or inspiring. Well, turns out it was all a big lie.
Never push that button. Sure it looks innocent and unassuming, but so does Miracle Whip, which is really just rancid chalk.
“Come on,” the button may coo. “Push me. You know you want to. Aren't you curious? It's just one little click of your mouse. What could it hurt?”
Don't listen to the talking button! Call me naïve, but I thought the point of having a blog was to communicate some message to an audience. But 90% of what I read during my little browsing session was completely unreadable.
To be fair, I realize that there are people who are born with severe punctuation disorders. While some people are born without limbs, others are born without the ability to use periods, spaces or commas. I think these people should avoid the internet. You don't see Mr. No Hands trying his luck with the harp, do you? Same rule applies here. I figure, if you can't type legibly, don't type.
And then there are those who intentionally want to confuse you. I will call these people “Mixed Capitalization Douche Bags.” They type all their sentences like so: “HeLlO Im A dOuCHe bAG!” Why would anyone do this? It just boggles me. If I could ask God only ONE question, it would be about this.
Luckily, if you do a lot of rummaging, wading through all the muck, you may find something worthwhile. Really the best way to insure a safe, eye-sore-free blogging experience, is to avoid the “next blog” button altogether and instead use some kind of search engine. To help you, I’ve added a link to one such search engine, “blogwise,” in the right margin. They screen all the blogs first, at least, which tends to help. Good luck and happy blogging!